Traci Lords
Friday, October 20, 2006
Keith Urban in Rehab
Keith Urban checked himself into rehab last night for drug issues. All promotional work for his new CD has been postponed.
He issued this statement,
"I deeply regret the hurt this has caused Nicole and the ones that love and support me,"
"One can never let ones guard down on recovery and I'm afraid that I have. With the strength and unwavering support I am blessed to have from my wife, family and friends, I am determined and resolved to a positive outcome."
Months ago rumors of Keith's cocaine problems were rampant and many thought Nicole was going to dump him because of it. I guess I would check myself into rehab to escape that botox-faced witch! Just kidding, she's fine.
Somewhere in space, Tom Cruise is loving this.
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Thx deltaskye
Afternoon Crumbs
Jordan Jodie can kiss Lucy Clarkson's ass - IDLYITW
Sharon Stone should take this proposal - A Socialite's Life
Madge fails to move merchandise for H&M - Popsugar
Phoney Braxton freaks out onstage in Las Vegas - Concrete Loop
Mischa Barton's heinous wig - Hollywood Tuna
Becks looks hot as usual - Just Jared
Madge buys David Banda's love - Hollywood Rag
Jessica Biel wants to be catwoman - Egotastic!
Name this nip - Mollygood
Bindi Irwin's show gets delayed - SAYOR
KFed on Leno
KFed hit Jay Leno last night to dance his way through his single, Privilege. Words can't describe how talentless he is. The kids on Kids Inc. are most ganster than him.
Don't forget to buy his album "Playing with Myself" which hits on Halloweenies.
Where Did the Sleeves Go?
Kate Moss tore the sleeves off a member's only jacket to perform with her honey, Pete Doherty, in Florence, Italy last night. She took the stage to sing a beautiful duet. By the looks of these picture it looks like they are doing karaoke.
In other Kate news, she's planning to launch her own fragrance for TopShop. This is part of Kate's multi-million dollar deal with the British retailer. No word yet on what it will smell like, but I'm not going to be cliche and say coke and sweat. Okay, coke and sweat with a tad bit of oregano for sweetness.
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Run! Wesley! Run!
Ruh Roh! Wesley Snipes has been spotted in Africa. Officials say that he is currently on set in Namibia. He has been there in August and no, he's not there giving birth or adopting a baby.
Wesley is in big trouble for not filing his tax returns and falsely claiming $12 million in refunds.
The charges allege Mr Snipes failed to file tax returns between 1999 and 2004, and conspired with two men to defraud the Internal Revenue Service (IRS), which collects taxes in the US.
Prosecutors say Eddie Kahn and Douglas Rosile, both from Florida, attempted to make it look like the actor had no liability for income tax.
He better stay over there, because he's so arrested if he steps foot here. He should dust off his "To Wong Foo" costume, because that will come in handy at the big house!
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It's Shiloh!
Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt or The Messiah as I like to call her, made a rare appearance in India today. Angelina brought Shiloh and Zahara out for a little ride. They quickly got into a car surrounded by bodyguards.
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Who Will Die on Desperate Housewives?
Ratings for the third season of Desperate Housewives aren't anything like the first season, so producers and writers are trying to boost the show up to help it return to its glory. For November sweeps they are planning to off one of the characters.
The episode involves Laurie Metcalf (who has already debuted on the show) going crazy at a local supermarket killing one of the supporting characters. There were rumors that Edie would be killed off, but it looks like Nora is going to get it. That's the rumor anyway.
A violent chain of events is set off when Lynette (Felicity Huffman), Nora (Kiersten Warren) and Edie (Nicollette Sheridan) go to the grocery store and run into new neighbor Carolyn Bigsby, played by Metcalf.
Lynette puts her foot in her mouth by introducing Nora to Carolyn as "The woman my husband had an affair with before we were married."
The misguided joke sets off Carolyn, because she's actually on the premises to kill her cheating husband, who owns the store. She pulls a gun and takes the three women hostage!
Then, just as the SWAT team arrives, Carolyn panics and begins firing the gun wildly. After wounding Lynette in the arm and killing Nora, she points the gun at Edie. But before she can fire, Carolyn is taken out in a hail of bullets by the SWAT team. When the smoke clears, a grief-stricken Lynette convinces Tom (Doug Savant), to add another child to their brood, by adopting the daughter he'd had with Nora during their affair.
Unfortunately, I was hoping that dumb-ass Eva LongWhoria would get it. Looks like she's around for sweeps anyway.
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Jordan is a Hot Liar
Earlier this week, an atrocious recording of Peter Andre and Jordan's duet of "A Whole New World" hit the internet hard. Peter sounded fine, like a nelly queen, but fine. Jordan however sounded like she was in a whole new world of her own. Actually she sounded like Aladdin was raping her anally while delivering her part.
Ok, you get the picture! Well, the couple now claim that it wasn't them! Sure....
Jordan's rep said, "It is a spoof and we have made our legal team aware of it."
The single will be out by Christmas.
Listen here if you haven't already gone deaf from listening to the first time.
Thx Hinatha
Robbie Williams' Hairy Ass
At last night's MTV Latin America Awards in Mexico City, Robbie Williams showed us his better side. As always and not surprisingly, he mooned one of his fans. After his performance, Robbie made eyes at his female fan and then turned around and showed her his hairy ass. He then hugged and kissed at her.
He could've shaved that shit. Yuck. He probably has serious dingles up in there.
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Lionel Richie is "The Greatest Porn Star" He Knows
Lionel Richie is hot in bed and wants you to know it. The father of Nicole Richie said that he's the hottest porn star he knows.
"I am a legend in my own mind, the greatest porn star I know. You can't be a love songwriter and not be the greatest porn star."
We should ask Parasite Hilton...you know she effed her best friend's father when she was a teenager. I'm gonna say I believe Lionel. The quiet ones are usually rough and hard in bed.
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Anna Nicole Smith Buries Her Son
Anna Nicole Smith along with about 20 close family and friends buried Daniel Smith in the Bahamas yesterday. TMZ reports that Anna screamed loudly and cried as her only son was buried.
Daniel Smith died 6 weeks ago from a drug overdose. He was only 20-years old.
A gold hearse brought Daniel's body to the cemetery attended by 20 people, including the CEO of TrimSpa, a diet pill company that employs Anna as its spokesperson. The ceremony featured an open casket. According to one source Daniel was buried in jeans, a t-shirt and a baseball hat with another hat - bearing the iconic Nike swoosh - by his side. A source from WENN news service, who had seen a picture of the body in the open casket, said the body appeared quite bloated.
Unfortunately, I don't have anything funny to say. Let's hope, Anna gets her shit together.
This Would've Been Hotter with a Model
No wonder models are starving, bitches can't afford to buy food! Anyway, here's Cate Blanchett looking mighty hot in November's Vogue.
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Smoke Me Up Before You Go Go!
People need to chill! Several mental health charities are pissing mad after George Michael was caught smoking weed on TV in Madrid. The drug is legal in Spain and bitch was doing nothing wrong. So, why are mental health groups pissed?
Well, George made this little statement while he puffed, "This stuff keeps me sane and happy. I couldn't write without it. I'd say it's a great drug - but obviously it's not very healthy."
"It's very good for creative people. But it can be a terrible, terrible drug."
Richard Colweill of SANE, a mental health charity said.
"It is the kind of comment we would not want to see from a pop star who is likely to appeal to young people, although he might be appealing more to the older generation now."
"We are concerned about the message this can send out to young people, especially when there is such confusion about the legality of cannabis. "Cannabis is illegal because it can be harmful, as can all drugs. We need stronger and clearer messages about cannabis harm so that people are in a position to make informed choices. All drugs have potential to harm and that is the principal message we need to get across."
Oh Jesus! Yes, George Michael is insane and I doubt he really meant that this drug is helping him become not sane. People take things so literal. Just let the bitch smoke his weed and sleep in cars! He did say that it wasn't a good drug, what more do they want?
He's hot shit though.
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Fraggle Rock the Movie!
The Jim Henson Company are currently developing a feature-film of the beloved 1980s cartooon, Fraggle Rock. The show premiered on HBO in 1983 and lasted for 5 seasons.
The untitled film will for the first time take Gobo, Wembley, Mokey, Boober and Red on an adventure outside of Fraggle Rock where they will interact with the strange beings in "outer space" (also known as humans). The treatment is being written by author Ahmet Zappa (The Monstrous Memoirs of a Mighty McFearless) who will also executive produce the project with Brian Henson and Jason Lust. Lisa Henson will produce.
Lisa Henson said, "'Fraggle Rock' has remained a favorite project at our Company and has certainly continued to be loved by its many devoted fans, so we are thrilled to begin work on this project. With its message of celebrating diversity and its ambitious goal of promoting world peace, now is the perfect time to embark on a new Fraggle adventure."
I was never into this shit, but a lot of my fashion choices I owe to Fraggle Rock. I hope they don't screw this one up!
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NBC is Boring
NBC has announced that when they air Madonna's "Confessions" concert on November 22nd, they will edit out the crucifixation scene that has drawn controversy around the world. During "Live to Tell" Madonna is mounted in a mock crucifixtion on a disco cross in a crown of thorns.
European church groups threatened to bomb her ass and US church groups cried "bloody murder".
NBC would not comment on why they removed it, You won't see "Madonna on a crucifix. That element of the song is no longer in the show. How they came to that conclusion I really don't know."
It is unknown whether or not the number will be included on the DVD when that is released. That's probably why they did that crap, so people could drop more dough on her DVD.
Anyway, I found this hot blog called "Roman Catholic Blog" where they discussed this in detail. I learned some hot prayers.
One commenter writes,
The CAPTION THIS CONTEST Winner for October 19th!!
What are you going to be for Halloween this year? Paris Hilton's career. - no one
Runner-up:
New dancer for Fergies tour....you never know! - El Bastardo
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Birthday Sluts
Viggo Mortensen (48)
Rob Cesternino (28)
Snoop Dogg (35)
Dannii Minogue (35)
Danny Boyle (50)
Tom Petty (56)
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Should Isaiah Washington Be Fired?
The fight between Isaiah Washington and Patrick Dempsey may have ended with their fellow Grey's Anatomy co-star, T.R. Knight being outed. During Isiah's and Patrick's fight, he yelled, "“I'’m not your little faggot like T.R."
T.R. Knight came out later today due to rumors surrounding the argument.
Sources on the set claims that Isiah may lose his job to do this little slip.
Should he fired? Yes, but not because he outed a bitch...but because he's damn ugly!
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Dreamgirls Overload
Dreamgirls isn't coming out till this Christmas, but they have already started rolling out the hype. The newest trailer debuted last night as well as these posters. Beyonce is praying for an Oscar, but should settle for a Razzie.
I have high hopes for this one.
God Awful!
This is the official poster for the upcoming Broadway production of Legally Blonde the Musical. The show is based on the film that starred Reese Witherspoon. Broadway star, Laura Bell Bundy, plays Elle Woods with Chico as Bruiser.
The show will first tryout in San Francisco this January with a March 2007 opening on Broadway.
Legally Blonde joins the long list of musicals being produced for Broadway. Cry Baby, Young Frankenstein, The Little Mermaid and High Fidelity will hit Broadway next year.
All I ask is, why?
Donatella, Just Because
I've been giving a lot of attention to the grossness that is Rachel Zoe that I have failed to give attention to one of my favorite fuglies. Donatella Versace is seen here at a press conference in Beijing on October 16th. The staffers of the conference were smart to dim the lights as to not offend the good people of Bejing.
Donatella doesn't look as bad as usual...what am I saying? She looks wretched. Those flowers look more like a human being than she does.
That being said, I'd hit it.
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