I'm Sorry I've Ruined Your Morning With These Pics....

Ugh! I can smell the dirty jizz in her asshole from here.

Paris Hilton is currently stinking up Germany Las Vegas and found time to smoke and pollute the air in a local club at Janet Jackson's release party at Tao. This is the equivalent of a terrorist attack and must be dealt with! Bitch needs a butt lift.

Brit Brit Did Not Fire Her PR Whore!

Brit Brit Spears is photoshopped to death on the cover of Q Magazine which will feature 20 revolving covers of several artists. One is Brit Brit pregnant with SPF2. It looks like they just took one of her old photos and poppped a pregnant belly on it. You know that girl's arms are not that thin? Her shit is like tree trunk arms.

She also denied claims that she fired her pr rep, Leslie Sloane Zelnick. Leslie is still working for her ass.

In her interview with Q, Brit says that the biggest mistake she's ever made is listening to other bitches.

"The biggest mistake I'’ve made in my life is probably listening to other people. Because as a child you don'’t really listen to other people - you listen to yourself, right, all the time. That inner voice, you know… And I think there's been times when I've been manipulated, but you just have to learn from andt abd be strong and not let people take advantage of you."

What is this dumb ass talking about?! Um...I hate to break it to you sweetie, but there's still one giant leech on your back that is taking advantage of you and I'm not talking about SPF1 or 2. This poor chick is clueless and fat and that's a bad combination.

She should just have a photoshop artist on staff.

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Just Shut Your Ears During Her Part

JLo and Skeletor performed together again in San Juan, Puerto Rico this past weekend. They are beginning their publicity blitz for their movie (poster below). The film is also generating Oscar buzz for the two.

Nu uh! JLo getting nominated for an Oscar is like Paris getting nominated for a Grammy. It's just not meant to be. I promise you that if this ho gets nominated for an Oscar I will take pictures of myself eating my own shit! Add this to my promise that if Kiki gets nominated I will eat my own pubes.

This could make for a delicious buffet!

Elvis Presley Banged Marilyn Monroe

Elvis Presley's former agent, Byron Raphael, claims that his client knocked the boots with Marilyn Monroe in just minutes after meeting her. Marilyn and Elvis were both clients of the William Morris Agency and the agents felt that the two should date to boost both of their profiles. Marilyn turned the offer down. Elvis refused to give up and made Byron bring Marilyn to his hotel room.

Byron said: "When he saw her, they came together and, without saying a word, started kissing. I was in shock and I didn't know what to do. Then Marilyn, who was 10 years older, said, 'You're pretty good for a guitar player.'

"After two minutes, they went into the bedroom and I didn't know if I was supposed to leave, or stay and wait for them, so I just dozed off. The next thing I knew I was startled awake by the door opening and I dove behind the bar. And they both walked out stark naked."

Now that's some hot sex right there. I hope she didn't screw Fat Elvis though, cause that bitch was nasty. I heard though that Elvis wasn't packing large. That's disappointing.

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Kristin Cavallari in Revenge of the Nerds

Casting is underway for the remake of the classic film, Revenge of the Nerds. The new script will feature new characters, but with the same premise.

Laguna Beach piece of trash, Kristin Cavallari, will play a sorority sister alongside Katie Cassidy. Christopher Marquette (The Girl Next Door) and Efren Ramirez (Napoleon Dynamite) will play the nerds.

Shooting begins in Atlanta next month.

Looks like Hollywood is going to ruin yet another good movie by putting a bunch of trash in it. I'm surprised they didn't throw Paris Hilton to stink it up some more.


This slut at the opening of Red Pearl Kitchen in LA

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Stop Milking It!

We all know what happened at the Super Bowl a few years ago and we're constantly reminded by Janet Jackson and Justin Timberlake. Janet recently went on Oprah and said she would no longer talk about the event that changed many TV rules.

The two are planning to stage some kind of huge reunion at the Grammys or Oscars. The pair haven't spoken much since the infamous "wardrobe malfunction" but both have been very vocal about it.

A source said: "A reunion will help re-boost the sales of their albums."

Reps for both decline there's talks of a reunion.

Who cares already? It's not like bitch is shy. Every single photo shoot since then has featured her without her top. We're over it! She should do something new and show her vajayjay.

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This Bitch is Giving Pete Doherty a Run for His Crackhead Money!

George Michael, 43, was arrested on a drug-related charge in London yesterday. He was found yet again slumped in his car at a traffic light. Police quickly rushed him to the hospital where he was cited for cannabis possession. This is the third time in 8-months that his ass has been found asleep at the wheel.

A source said: "An officer saw George slumped in his seat in a semi-conscious state. He was helped out of the car and an ambulance was called because there were real concerns for him."

After he was checked out in the hospital, he was taken to the police station where he was booked. George must arrive in court on November 20th to face the charges.

George's man, said: "He has nothing to say. He's fine and I'’ve got him a McDonald's."

McDonald's sure cures everything, right? I don't understand England. Why the hell don't they just take his license away and his car? This bitch is crazy and if he's that tired he should just stay home and take a long nap.



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